Yahoo Sports- It’s been nearly a week since Lions fans suffered through the torture of a controversial playoff loss to the Cowboys, but the bitterness of the Detroit faithful is continuing to manifest itself in entertaining ways. First, there was this heartbreaking report from a local bar. Then, a die-hard by the name of Dave Morian had to have a tattoo altered. Now, since all-caps Facebook statuses and exclamation point-laden tweets simply won’t do, a group of perturbed Lions fans have taken to the streets (or maybe it’s more accurate to say 40 to 50 feet above the streets) to air their grievances.

With a smattering of billboards strewn about downtown Detroit, an anonymous group has come up with an even more visible way to advertise their distaste for last weekend’s officiating in Dallas. The billboards, which the fans set up through outdoor advertising company Outfront Media, read “Detroit Lyin'” and feature stock images of football referees.

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I just came up with Pick Up Game right on the spot. It’ll probably catch on like wildfire and I’ll be an internet god by lunch time tomorrow. Can’t wait.
I have to say as much as I want to be annoyed by all the bill boards I’d be lying if I didn’t completely sympathize with their outrage. Don’t get me wrong, buying a billboard to make a statement in a half abandoned half illiterate city is next level dumb shit but I get the desire to let your feeling be known. My teams have me so twisted and dead inside that I started a blog that no one reads and pound away on a keyboard praying for some kind of therapeutic mental relief. My depression has boiled over to the point that I have to see my thoughts in writing so when I eventually snap there will be some answers for my family and friends.
I was recently having a normal day not really thinking about any stupid Browns meltdowns when I heard a guy on the radio say he’s never seen an official make a call and then pick up the flag. And I agree, once the call is made, you should pretty much have to go with it. Then all of the memories came rushing back from “Bottle Gate.” The Browns ran a play and then then officials stopped the game and said the play before the last play was under review. That CAN”T happen. It’s a well known rule that once the next play is ran then the previous play can’t be reviewed. How can it happen? Why do the officials get to keep their jobs when it does happen? How does an official make a call on the field and then nothing happens? They normally can’t wait to make a pass interference call. I think their whole bonus is based on flags thrown percentage increases. They’re so in their own heads about this shit now it can be unwatchable at times. That flag NEVER gets picked up. Why now? In the Playoffs? Hurting the Lions and benefitting the Cowboys. Those are questions that will be haunting you Lions fans for decades. It’s like the death of a loved one. It never gets easier but you have more and more good days. You’ll always remember and sometimes you be overcome with rage. It’ll help to call a friend and talk about it. Maybe go to therapy, or better yet, start a blog.

-Ken

In case you need to abuse yourself:

“I can still score 18 if I can just get another 25 shots!”

You gotta love Dion’s outlook at any NBA game. It’s always a chance for him to shine. Every possession is an opportunity for him to make up for the last brick he threw up. The Thunder gave up about 13 wins just by giving him a jersey, I can only hope they figure it out before it’s too late and they’ve missed the playoffs. He will shoot you out of any game without a second thought.

I feel like a doctor telling you that your team has cancer but I’m sure you already had a good idea.

-Ken

“I’ve made a huge mistake.”

So as you may have noticed (you haven’t) Blown Call Sports hasn’t been posting anything for going on a bunch of months now. I just want you to know it’s not entirely your fault. The main issue was that the batteries in the mouse were dead and I hate using the touch pad on the laptop. First world problem? Probably, but I’d never actually check with a dirt person to find out for sure.
We missed out on some of the most important sports stories in the history of Cleveland while we were gone and there’s no excuse for that. LeBron coming back to Cleveland. The Browns on their way to having a great season only to have the front office completely undermine the coaches and force a unprepared quarterback onto the field and calling plays from the owners box. (Not sure if the last 3 parts of that are true but that’s the perception around town so it might as well be true.) It’s not like you missed out on a whole lot though. I can guarantee that my LeBron homecoming post would have been a bunch of YouTube links to his greatest Cavs moments followed by a short sappy love letter to all the suffering Cleveland fans. September through November posts would have all been titled “Browns to the Super Bowl” and I would have been begging Ray Farmer to give Brian Hoyer a $100 million contract. Everything after that until now would have been a drunken rant about how I hate my mother for not only giving me life but raising me in Northeast Ohio. Which leads us to now…

Cleveland.com- Browns offensive coordinator Kyle Shanahan will consider leaving Cleveland — even for a lateral move — because of friction between some of the coaches and some in the front office, multiple league sources have told cleveland.com.
Shanahan will interview Thursday morning for the Bills head coaching vacancy, and it’s his ultimate goal to become a head coach. But he also might have an opportunity to be reunited with his father Mike, which is enticing to him. Kyle worked under Mike for four seasons in Washington before they were let go after the 2013 season.
Three teams are interested in possibly hiring Mike Shanahan as head coach and Kyle as offensive coordinator, sources said. They are the 49ers, Raiders and Bills. Mike Shanahan has interviewed with those teams and will also interview with the Chicago Bears.
Kyle Shanahan was eager to strike out on his own again, but landed in a situation that has become dysfunctional for him, the sources said. The biggest problem, they say is that the personnel side and coaches aren’t seeing eye to eye on some key issues. One source said some coaches became upset when a high-ranking personnel member texted from the press box to the sidelines about play calls.
The coaches also may have felt pressure to start Johnny Manziel in the biggest game of the season, with the playoffs on the line. No mandate was given from the front office, but some staffers felt that the higher-ups wanted to see what their No. 22 overall pick could do. Shanahan did his best to bring Manziel up to speed, but it was evident he wasn’t ready to play when he started against the Bengals, and flopped miserably.
Now, it appears that general manager Ray Farmer is willing to give Manziel another shot next year, and not everyone in the building is in agreement that the former Heisman Trophy winner has what it takes to succeed. Browns coach Mike Pettine has said the quarterback situation is “muddy at best” and that the Browns will leave no stone unturned in their bid to fix it.
Shanahan is receiving head coaching interest this year because of the job he did with an offense that had major issues. He lost all three of his Pro Bowlers for much of the season in center Alex Mack, receiver Josh Gordon and tight end Jordan Cameron.
Still, Shanahan helped the Browns climb to the top of the AFC North after their 24-3 rout of the Bengals. At one point, he had quarterback Brian Hoyer in the top 10, and the offense was ranked No. 14 overall as late as week 11.
“(Becoming a head coach) has always been my goal,” Shanahan said in October. “About 95 percent of coaches, if you ask them, that’s eventually their goal. Everyone wants to be at the top of their profession, and head coach is the top of our profession.”The climate, however, is such that Shanahan might be willing to leave even if he doesn’t get a head coaching job. What’s more, he’s excited about the idea of trying to win a Super Bowl with his father and finishing the job they started in Washington.
The Browns would have to let him out of his contract in order for him to make a lateral move. Not even the additional title of assistant head coach would be enough for the Browns to have to let him go.
Shanahan, who’s been an offensive coordinator for seven seasons, worked under Mike in Washington from 2010-2013, where the two led the Redskins’ offense to a top 10 finish in 2013. Quarterback Robert Griffin III also enjoyed his finest season in Washington under the Shanahans, and running back Alfred Morris rushed for more than 1,200 yards in each of his first two seasons.
Shanahan looked forward to stepping out his father’s shadow in Cleveland and re-establishing himself as a top coordinator in his own right. But if Mike takes a head job and wants to hire Kyle, it’s a good bet he’ll ask the Browns to let him go.
At that point, they’d likely have no choice but to accommodate him, considering it’s the top offensive position on the club. If he doesn’t want to be here, the Browns are unlikely to force him to stay.

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Let me give you the basic rundown of that article: Kyle Shanahan was going to interview with the Buffalo Bills.

That should pretty much explain the situation in Cleveland. Pure, uncut, grade A dysfunction. Coaches are bailing to go somewhere that’s colder and more depressing. Am I surprised? Of course not. I’m already positive that no real player wants to be here, why would any smart coach want to stick around long enough to get fired for coaching a bunch of losers? The problem is that Kyle isn’t even a proven coach yet. He’s still mostly known for his dad winning a Super Bowl in the 90’s. We’re at the point where we can’t afford to lose coaches who’ve MET winning coaches. I’ve met Gerry Faust a couple of times. That pretty much means I deserve an interview to be a tight end coach at least right?
This whole situation just sets the franchise back another 3 years on top of the 4 years it was already set back form the new head coach and 4 years of bad drafting. We’re basically looking at 2022 before we can expect the Browns to be relevant again. And that all hinges on whether or not we blow up the coaching staff after next season.

It’s good to be back.

-Ken

Once an infected gay has wrestled you to the ground, it’s likely the virus has already been spread. Drinking Lysol has not shown to slow the process despite initial reports that such an action could possibly cure a carrier of the disease.

 

The prognosis is not good for Johnny Football. First he can’t beat out a cripple for the starting QB job and now he might be infected with a career threatening and potentially “fabulous” disease. Michael Sam is full blown gay balls and it’s already threatening his chances to make an NFL roster. Johnny’s football career is already a hot mess and any more distractions will only make his path to becoming a starting QB more unlikely.

Per league sources: Johnny was seen pooping rainbows in the locker room after the Saturday night preseason game vs. the Rams. Coach Pettine declined comment as to whether or not he believed Johnny was already showing signs of infection. Manziel’s agent also declined comment but mentioned that his client was scheduled to test drive a Prius on Sunday.

The hits just keep coming for the Browns.

 

-Ken

Le Batard’s pathetic sign he actually paid money for…..

 

It’s been very hard to locate an actual Miami Heat fan in the weeks since LeBron has decided to come back to Cleveland. I live close to the nest here in Florida and until 3 weeks ago I couldn’t walk 10 feet without seeing a Heat jersey and don’t give me the bullshit excuse that the season is over and that’s why no one is wearing them. It’s the middle of the summer and perfect sleeveless weather. . And when you spend $130 on a shirt with no fucking sleeves, you can be DAMN sure it’s getting worn 5 times a week.  Even the fans that I’ve cornered into a conversation about the current state of the Heat can’t tell me anything other than they don’t care LeBron left and he owes them a big ol’ thank you for some reason that still has not been explained to me in any real coherent fashion. What the hell does LeBron owe them a thank you for?! HE was the one who brought THEM 2 more titles! Am I just getting roped in here? I mean it makes no sense even if they were purely doing it to troll Cleveland fans as Le Batard has even stated himself referring to his billboards he posted in Akron.

I thought Cavs fans could have come off better after the decision in 2010, obviously burning your own clothes in anger on national TV is not a good look, but this billboard is so much more of a bitch move I can’t even comprehend it. The jersey was on fire less than 3 minutes after LeBron said he was leaving; it was a gut reaction, in the Miami Heat of the moment. Le Batard has had weeks to formulate some kind of witty gesture to really stick it to LeBron or Cavs fans in general I guess. But the best he came up with was a passive aggressive blurb that sounds like a junior high school girl wrote it on Facebook.

I guess what I should really be saying here is the most obvious point in all of this. And this is what Le Batard and all 15 of the other Heat fans need to understand: You don’t matter anymore. You’re not important. No one cared what happened in Miami before LeBron and no one cares now because it was never about you. It was never about the Heat. It’s always been about LeBron. So you need to keep your mouths shut (as most of you have) and keep your billboards in your own city and be happy with what just happened to you for the last 4 years and understand that no one owes you a single shred of gratitude or even a half hearted thanks.

I guess Le Batard accomplished his goal of getting at least one Cleveland fan riled up but as far as I’m concerned his gesture was the dying breath of a shitty fan base and he knows he wont be talking about anything meaningful for the rest of his career so he need one last shot. ESPN suspended him for 2 days but he probably wishes they ordered him to be executed instead of having to go back and talk about Wade’s broken knees and Bosh’s crippling max deal that is already butt fucking the Heat back into the stone age.

So moments like this have brought out a new breed of Cavs fans. Fans who know we’re better than you. Prove me wrong. You can’t. Get used to it because it’s totally going to suck for you for a long time.

 

-Ken

Nice pearl necklace loser! Burn!

FantasySP.com-MINNEAPOLIS (AP) – Cleveland Indians shortstop Asdrubal Cabrera has left the game with the Minnesota Twins because of lower back spasms. Cabrera played two innings Monday night before being taken out.
(7/21/2014)

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This is new territory for me as a true homer in every sense of the word. I ALWAYS root for every player on my teams to be successful because that’s just what a dumb blind idiot would do. If he’s on the team he’s my favorite player. That’s the stupid thing I believe in. And a few years ago Asdrubal might have been about my favorite player on the Indians so I can honestly say that when he left the game tonight and I said “Good, get that fucking piece of shit outta’ there” that I was just as surprised to hear the words as anyone in the room. (Completely alone) I was surprised because I was at the game in Tampa a few years ago when Asdrubal broke his arm and I was devastated. He was my favorite player. Jesus Christ.
So what the hell happened? Well without getting into stats (because that would be responsible) I would just like to state that he’s totally being a piece of shit the last 2 years. It feels like every inning ends with him taking off his batting gloves and helmet and handing it to the first base coach because he just grounded into an inning ending DP. And I’ve lost count of all the errors this year. I don’t know the exact number but I’d guess it’s somewhere in the 1000’s so far. At least 50 a game. The Tribe have about 4 utility players starting every game and I don’t see why they just don’t trade Cabrera and plug in another at shortstop. He CAN’T be in the long term plans at the position right? That would be lunacy. As a matter of fact I know that Francisco Lindor is the SS waiting to be called up and he’s the best prospect in the whole organization. The future starts now.

-Ken

Gotta love (hate) Bosh’s total disregard for the little worthless people who only exist to make his life more comfortable. I would be completely surprised of the towel boy was even allowed to look at him in the eyes. But seriously, why would he ever waste a half second of his life to acknowledge a poor piece of shit when he needs to focus 100% on letting Tony Parker shoot layups in his face and getting open three ball looks.

I’m not saying he needs to completely turn around and say “No thank you, Mike. I’m already adequately hydrated thanks to your attentiveness, how’s your kids doing by the way? Little Mikey Jr. get an A on his science project?”
But at least give the guy a grunt and a head twitch. Nothing worse than the dismissive hand wave.

-Ken