I don’t really play video games or watch a ton of TV, I catch shit on Netflix but I don’t ever sit down for live TV outside of sports. But I do watch a ton of movies, so I guess I will start doing movie reviews for people like us. Kinda did that with Wolf of Wall Street, but I will really start now.
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American Hustle is about Christian Bale who is a fat ugly con man imagesVODLFM11and how he links up with Bradley Cooper (playing an FBI agent who catches Bale) and how they team up to bust out some politicians. Pretty good premise, also a semi true story from the 70’s. Bale as I’m sure you can guess is fucking perfect in any role he plays. From The Machinist, to the Fighter, to making a deep voice as Batman. He and Daniel Day Lewis are the best in the world right now. He plays a fat guy with a terrible comb over (take notes Ken) who is charming and a good talker, hence he is a con man. But he meets up with Amy Adams who is for sure one of the sneakiest hot chicks out there. imagesRVRFFHTLYou look at her and it’s plain Jane all the way. Nothing too great. Tits are eh, ass is not there I don’t think, body is ok. But she just has that likeability that makes you want to be nice to her for a night so you can raw dog. Throughout the whole movie she is in these open in the middle shirts, cleavage all over the place it was great. But they team up to run scams like loansharks without the actual loans. In walks Bradley Cooper with the best jew-fro perm in movie history.images1IYKOLQD He busts them out because he’s an FBI agent. Now Cooper is one of my favorite guys too (he was great in Silver Linings Playbook) and he is once again great in this. He’s over eager, funny, and kind of pathetic at the same time, which is hard to pull off for a good looking charismatic guy. But he teams up with Bale, seeing how good he is at the con, to bust the mayor of New Jersey and then in turn other politicians they meet along the way. Louis CK plays his boss, totally a bad casting move. All you see is Louis not the character and it’s distracting and just unneeded. Anyone could’ve played his FBI boss. Jeremy Renner plays the mayor with a hairstyle that like Louis’ casting is just unnecessary and distracting. It’s a ridiculous pompadour. jrStupid. But two brilliant pieces to the movie were parts played by Robert DeNiro and Jennifer Lawrence. DeNiro plays a mobster (go figure) but he does it like the old days. He’s not trying too hard and it works fucking perfectly. He needs to stick to this type of stuff to keep his rep up. And Jennifer Lawrence continues to dominate movies as the best actress out there. imagesCL7WNKHDSmoking hot. Unlike Amy Adams you know you want to suck JLaw’s asshole the second you see her. But I won’t give away the ending, it’s good but I could see it being predictable to some people (the ones who claimed no ending ever shocked them. To those pricks..You did NOT know who Keyser Soze was so fuck off). Overall it was probably a 7.5. Good acting, good story, good ending. Just a few distractions with casting and that fucking hair on Renner. Got the .5 for Jennifer Lawrence and Amy Adams kissing. On the lips no toungue

-Jesse

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