Michael Sam Sacks Johnny Manziel; Is Johnny Now Infected With The Gay?!

Posted: August 24, 2014 in blown call, breaking news, comedy, football, humor, manly humor, NFL Draft, popular culture & entertainment, satire, Sports

Once an infected gay has wrestled you to the ground, it’s likely the virus has already been spread. Drinking Lysol has not shown to slow the process despite initial reports that such an action could possibly cure a carrier of the disease.

 

The prognosis is not good for Johnny Football. First he can’t beat out a cripple for the starting QB job and now he might be infected with a career threatening and potentially “fabulous” disease. Michael Sam is full blown gay balls and it’s already threatening his chances to make an NFL roster. Johnny’s football career is already a hot mess and any more distractions will only make his path to becoming a starting QB more unlikely.

Per league sources: Johnny was seen pooping rainbows in the locker room after the Saturday night preseason game vs. the Rams. Coach Pettine declined comment as to whether or not he believed Johnny was already showing signs of infection. Manziel’s agent also declined comment but mentioned that his client was scheduled to test drive a Prius on Sunday.

The hits just keep coming for the Browns.

 

-Ken

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