Are The Browns Getting Better?

A Possible Franchise Quarterback That OTHER Team’s Fan’s Actually Wanted?


A Free Agent Signing Whose Name I’ve Heard Of?

A Favorable Draft Grade Given By People Outside Of The Browns Front Office?

Where Are Teams Going To Pass Against This Secondary?

A Good Running Back NOT Past His Prime?

The national media is doing everything they can to tear the Browns apart for “mishandling” Manziel already. They need to destroy this kid and team before the season starts otherwise what was the point of building him up in the first place? I think for the first time in my life as a Browns fan I can say that I think the team has made enough moves in the offseason that will translate into wins during the season. They can’t fuck this up now. They’re signing talent, not just warm bodies. Coaching is important and all but somewhere down the line you need to have talent on your team and the Browns simply didn’t have much for too long. We get excited about a fucking kicker for Christ’s sake! Josh Cribbs was the most exciting player for years because he ran back a zillion kickoffs during his career. Now there’s actually a pool of talent to choose from when talking about team strengths. We’re either building a strong playoff contender or the 2011 Eagles. Thank god they cut Vince Young before he called us the “Dream Team Part Deux”

-Ken

So is No One Going To Talk About LeBron’s Fake New Hair? Just Me? Ok…….

I submit exhibit ‘A’ to the court: This photo was taken March 10th, 2014 after an NBA game in which LeBron played.

And now Exhibit ‘B’: This photo was taken April 23rd following another NBA game. Looks like someone got a fresh coat of paint.

Actually I can’t tell if it’s a case of canned hair or a moving hairline. Could be shaping it higher to counteract the recession but it seems like it’d have to be a little higher.
Look, LeBron and I don’t have a lot in common other than our horrible fashion sense (I’m currently wearing a 2007 Cavs Eastern Conference Champions T-Shirt for about the 4th day in a row, 1 day of which I mowed the lawn and gym shorts from high school. And when I go to the store later I’m not even going to consider changing) and our horrible hairlines. He choose another team over mine. It hurt. He then has won multiple championships. That hurts too. I’m really trying to find a way to identify with him and like him. I feel like being honest about his impending baldness would make him a lot more likable. For EVERYONE. Just shave it bald and be proud! Then put on a Yankees hat. Hats have been the only acceptable way to hide baldness since our monkey ancestors ripped out all their hair digging for ticks and then dunked their head in a pile of elephant shit to cover it up. I wear a hat, and when I put it on I immediately become 10 years younger and look slightly less menacing and perverted. Even somewhat approachable. If I could wear a hat to job interviews I’d be the most employed person you’ve ever met.

-Ken

Superman GoPro Video Clears Up a Childhood Dilemma of Mine

Every kid has been asked “If you could be a superhero would you rather fly or be invisible?” and it’s always been a toss up. As a kid without porn you would pick invisible to walk around and perv on chicks. If you were a little riskier and adventurous (aka your nuts hadn’t dropped) you chose flying so you could go anywhere at anytime. Personally I picked invisibility because I’m slightly agoraphobic so I could just disappear and chill out (aka perv out of chicks). But after watching this video I think I’m changing my stance. Thanks to POV porn you no longer have to wonder what it looks like to fuck the hottest and sluttiest girls alive but this is one of the first POV flying simulations I’ve seen that looks awesome. Thanks dudes who made this, you’ve completely mind fucked 10 year old me.

The question still remains, fly or invisible?

-Jesse

Blown Call Presents: Is She Hot? Ashley All Day

I think this is a good edition of Is She Hot? because many people may not know who Ashley All Day is. I actually found out about her because I follow Mac Miller on Twitter and he has talked about her a bunch and I watched her YouTube video “Lean”. And I am very torn as to whether or not I can say “Ashley All Day is hot” because of a few very specific reasons. So here are some pictures, her videos and my Pro and Con list, please help me decide if she is hot or not!
Pros: Super hot face, great body, tattoos, probably a Raiders fan, mixed, most likely can beat my ass, maybe lesbian
Cons: Chain smokes cigs in a gangster way, pretty hood, most likely can beat my ass, good chance has taken dongs bigger than my leg

Who is the Better Liar?

There are two situations that every man has found himself in that he is forced to lie. Sure, you want to be truthful as much as you can in life (right?) but there are just a couple instances when you are with a woman that you HAVE to lie, I just want to ask which one sounds more believable. Let me lay the scenarios: 1) You are smashing a chick for the 2nd or 3rd time, the first one was a drunken mess and you lasted hours, performed like a God and made her beg for more. Now you’re sober and you pump twice and cum like god damn Speedy Gonzales. 2) You are at a friends’ house for a small get together or party and you can feel the chicken wings/Taco Bell/Micky D’s bubbling in your stomach so you drop a nasty Dumb and Dumber style shit in the toilet. No air freshener so fuck the next dude who walks in, it’s his fault for having a small bladder. Only you open the door and it’s the girl you just started dating, she really has to pee and is rushing to get past you into the danger zone.

So who could come up with the better on the fly lie to make themselves not look like the total putz that we all really are? Quick cum or monster dump?

Revis To The Patriots; Bills Cancel Their Season

This pitch was either a 104mph strike or barely went 5 feet

PFT-Well, that didn’t take long.

Ex-Buccaneers cornerback Darrelle Revis has come to terms on a one-year, $12 million contract with the Patriots, ESPN’s Adam Schefter reported Wednesday night.

Revis was slated to make $16 million with the Buccaneers in 2014, so it appears he may have taken a pay cut. However, he can again hit the market next offseason.

Revis, who turns 29 in July, is widely regarded as one of the NFL’s top cover corners — a player capable of covering top receivers all over the field. He has intercepted 21 passes in seven NFL seasons.

However, this will be his third team in as many seasons. The Jets traded him to the Buccaneers last April for two draft picks, including a first-rounder that became Defensive Rookie of the Year Sheldon Richardson. Then, earlier Wednesday afternoon, the Buccaneers released Revis just one year into a six-year, $96 million deal — which was a series of one-year, $16 million team options.

But even after the Buccaneers bailed, there was little doubt Revis would have a robust market. And in the end, it was New England that got the deal done — and ever so quickly.

For the Patriots, this is the ultimate counterpunch after the Broncos signed away cornerback Aqib Talib on the first day of free agency. It also prevents a Jets-Revis reunion.

And does it ever set up a showdown in Foxborough between Denver and New England in the 2014 regular season.

And the Patriots just keep ripping the hearts out of Dolphin and Jets fans. I’m not going to bother including the Bills fans in this discussion because they know better than to think they have a shot at making the playoffs. But the rest of these dummies just can’t get it through their stupid heads. The Patriots aren’t even playing in the same league as you. They don’t even realize the Dolphins exist. Going to Miami to play the Dolphins is better than a bye week. Even if they lose who gives a shit because the Dolphins are still going to struggle to reach .500 and they just spent the weekend in Miami. The Jets are the loud dog in your neighborhood that runs away and pisses itself when you start walking towards it. Sorry to break it to you, but the Patriots are playing against the Bronco’s and that’s it. Everyone else is a scrimmage until wild-card week starts.

-Ken

Golf Channel; Where To Get Your Hooked Nose Broad Fix

“Are you me in 30 years?”

EEP! I was watching Golf Central this morning (staring at the screen to see moving colors and pictures with the volume down) and I realized I was focusing in on Paige and Kelly’s beaks. Which one is bigger? Which one could stab through your neck? Whose could hold more worms and twigs? I think Paige wins…by a nose.

Best Kind of Boobs Vote (All Safe For Work, I Promise)

I am just going to put links for pictures of the different kinds of boobs, those are obviously NSFW, but I just need an answer to this question. I was listening to the Billy Madison Show (thebillymadisonshow.com) this morning and they asked, what are the best kind of boobs? And that really got me thinking because there are so many good ones. Soapy, under, side, sandy, wet tshirt, wifebeater, etc. The possibilities are almost endless so I will put it to a vote, What Are the Best Kind of Boobs?

Soapy- http://twicsy.com/i/rQSTmc
Side boob- http://www.juxtapost.com/site/permlink/95d6aeb0-1a27-11e2-a2be-b1c77940f11b/post/katy_perry39s_pinup_girl_side_boob/
Underboob- http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2013/05/underboob-wow-35.jpg
Sandy boobs (link leads to a very nice video)- http://galleries.alluringvixens.com/justene2-wildgirlv/1/?ccbill=2135377
Girls POV boobs- http://brosome.com/a-lovely-little-tribute-to-the-wonderful-point-of-boob/point-of-boob-1/
Whipped Cream Boobs- http://i1.wp.com/therynoshorn.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/Boobsday-big-boobs-nice-rack-6.jpg
Wife Beater Boobs- http://i1.wp.com/therynoshorn.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/tuesday-boobsday-pretty-girl-great-body-nice-boobs-41.jpg

-Jesse